Turning the Hit into a Gift

Making it Through a Second Term

If you’re like me, you feel gut-punched by the election.

I saw the rising up of a wave of redemption and love. I savored the dream of full equality for women, the reclamation of civility and the restoration of integrity in our public sphere. I saw a Madame President leading the healing of our country and offering a potent inspiration for my girls. I wanted the message to be sent to women everywhere that now is your time, that violent rhetoric could be defeated, and that people of color are celebrated in their leadership and gifts.

And America decided that our country needed something different: a corrupt con man who lies constantly, insults liberally, and governs by self-interested whims, threats and acts of retribution. A man who shows that if you are rich and powerful enough, you can commit crimes, assaults, and frauds with impunity.

The election night statistic that struck me most viscerally was exit polling that 35% of the country felt afraid of the prospect of a Trump win. I don’t think that fear is unfounded and I share it. Democracy, the rule of law, the planetary ecosystem, and yes, the economy, are entering a perilous period now.

Fear is rational when our country has made a dangerous choice. We need to be real that for the next four years, 1/3 or more of our country is going to be living in some level of fear for their safety. It could go higher if Trump weaponizes the government against his enemies as he has promised to do but I doubt it will go much lower.

Fear and trauma go hand and hand and for more than 100 million Americans, fear and trauma are part of what his second term will bring: a daily reminder that bullying, violence, and marginalization may happen again. As a white man, I am deeply sorry that we haven’t yet gotten past the hypermasculine brutality and yes, racism, to commit to create a country that is safe and respectful for everyone. Trump’s victory promises a world of pain for so many. All I can say is that, personally, I care for you and welcome you and will work with you to keep making things better.

I also want to apologize to the world community that we appear, at least in the short-term, to be failing to lead the world in a brighter direction. We are letting you down. We have given the unmistakeable signal that even in America, dark authoritarianism can overpower the better angels of our nature. Trump’s re-election diminishes hope for freedom everywhere and emboldens dictators, strong men, and repressive regimes.

Trump’s first term was a stain on our country’s reputation. His second? We don’t know yet but what is clear is that America is sending our global family the message that we care less about you. We are less special than we have perhaps portrayed, less of a shining city on a hill. We are prone to be entranced by lies, distracted by hate, absorbed by self-interest, and reckless in our use of power.

Trump is no longer an aberration. We have fully witnessed his character and his deeds and still, we have chosen him again by even greater numbers. He is a now an emissary of our collective shadow: arrogant, selfish, and mean. In re-electing Trump, we have to own what is less noble in us, as a country, and I know that for so much of the world, that is a disappointment.

Where to go now?

I once practiced the Japanese art of aikido for several years with George Leonard, a force of positivity like few others. One phrase he repeated regularly stuck with me: take the hit as a gift.

The principle in aikido is that all attacks are energy and if we skillfully blend with an attack and re-direct it, we can harness its energy for something more constructive. Aikido senseis do this in remarkably beautiful ways, with ferocious attacks turned into something more like an elegant dance.

As we each work, in our own way, to process Trump’s victory, let’s do our best to take the hit as a gift. Trump’s victory can catalyze the rising up of a new wave of change agents and a new commitment to higher principles. We’ll have to defend the institutions of our country and protect those who come under assault. We’ll have to come to terms with the shadow of our country and see, hopefully once and for all, what we need to outgrow.

Trump’s re-election can, from the longer perspective of history, become something that catalyzes the birth of a new era. It can be like the irritating sand that leads the oyster to form a pearl. The pearl is an expression of our better nature. When we see his lies, we can commit to a fuller honesty. When we witness the cruelty, we can choose compassion. When we see the dishonor, we can summon our nobility.

Trump’s assaults on reason, dignity, and respect can be turned into energy that strengthens our character, builds our movements, and frees our spirits. We did it before and we can do it again.

We can take the hit as a gift and transform the suffering that is coming into something that serves. It will take time, and we’ll need to be resilient and steadfast. Sometimes it may even appear that all is lost and we’ll need to ground ourselves in faith.

As Martin Luther King said, the moral arc of the universe is long but it bends towards justice. We are now going to bend the bow of history substantially away from what is moral, uplifting, and just. But that could be the propulsive force that slingshots us into a brighter future. In his victory speech, Donald Trump promised a new golden age for America. While it might be hard to imagine, his moral depravity may well be the force propeling us to choose a more enlightened path as a country.

There will be a woman President someday. America will rise in spirit again. We will awaken from the lies and remember the truth in our souls.

I pray that we quickly learn what we need to learn from Trump’s ascent so that we can eventually welcome a new dawn.